Magazine

My mate Dave from the pub told me the best way to handle the situation was with a pint glass and a beer mat, as if I were dealing with a slightly aggressive bluebottle in a beer garden. My mother-in-law,...

It's exactly 3:17 am, and one of the twins has just managed to produce a bodily fluid that somehow defies the laws of physics, breaching the boundaries of her nappy and ascending halfway up her back. I'm sitting on the...

The digital thermometer read 99.1°F at exactly 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and my daughter was methodically attempting to gnaw through the wooden rail of her crib like a beaver possessed. Outside, the Portland rain was doing its usual endless...

It was 2:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I was standing in the dark staring at the video monitor like it was a horror movie. My middle child, who up until that week had been a perfectly stationary potato, was...

I'm sitting on the sand at Oak Street Beach with a three-month-old who looks like a poorly powdered donut. The wind is whipping off Lake Michigan. I'm holding a tube of thick white zinc oxide paste, trying to coat my...