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How Many Bibs Do I Need? A Tech Dadβs Guide To Drool Mathematics
Tuesday, 3:14 AM. I'm standing in our freezing laundry room holding a tiny, sour-milk-soaked triangle of fabric by two fingers, staring into the dark void of the dryer drum. My wife is upstairs walking our screaming 11-month-old in tight circles,...
Why You Must Buy Baby Bibs Organic: A Pediatric Nurse Explains
I was staring at a laundry basket overflowing with thirty-two polyester-blend baby shower gifts when I realized my registry was a massive failure. Before I had my son, I thought these fabric scraps were just cute accessories to tie an...
Why My Perfect Pink Infant Bedding Set Ended Up In The Trash
I was thirty-eight weeks pregnant, sitting on the floor of my Chicago apartment, crying over a contractor bag. Inside the plastic bag was roughly four hundred dollars worth of perfectly coordinated blush textiles. It was a complete crib set I...
The 3 AM Disaster That Taught Me Everything About Baby Loveys
Tuesday, 6:42 PM. The Central Line. Specifically, the perilous two-inch gap between the train carriage and the platform at St. Paul's station. That's exactly where it went. Maya's beloved, slightly grey-tinged, biologically questionable scrap of fabric slipped from her sticky...
Surviving Chicago Winters With a Long Sleeve Baby Girl Bodysuit
I'm standing by the changing table in our drafty apartment. It's mid-November, the wind is howling off Lake Michigan, and my six-day-old daughter is screaming. She looks like a furious, wrinkled potato. My mother had lovingly shipped a box of...
Decoding the Knitted Romper: A Dad's Guide to Baby Hardware
My mother-in-law cornered me in the kitchen last Tuesday to declare that any kind of woven wool would immediately give the baby a full-body rash. Ten minutes later, my neighborβa guy who brews his own kombucha in a garageβleaned over...
Debugging the Base Layer: A Dadβs Guide to Bodysuit Blanks
Before my son was born, I received three distinct pieces of base-layer advice that completely crashed my internal logic board. My mother insisted I needed to wrap the baby in three layers of fleece because our Portland house is drafty....
Why My First Baby Cardigan Knitting Pattern Was A Total Disaster
We were somewhere between Waco and Austin on I-35 when the screaming reached a pitch I didn't even know a human vocal cord could produce. I made my husband pull the truck over into a Buc-ee's parking lot, scrambled into...
The great fluffy lie (and why I started googling babywolle kaufen)
The parcel arrived on a wet Tuesday, smelling faintly of lavender and aggressively good intentions. Great Aunt Muriel had knitted the twins matching cardigans. I pulled the first one out of the tissue paper and immediately realised we had a...