When The Grandparents Bring Over Their 1980s Death Trap Baby Gear
I was wearing my husbandβs stained grey sweatpants, the ones with the mysterious hole near the left knee, standing in my driveway at 10 AM on a Tuesday while clutching a mug of coffee I had already microwaved three times....
My chaotic guide to finding an orphaned baby squirrel in your yard
The wind in Chicago in April is basically a personal insult. I was already standing in the kitchen watching my toddler have a full-scale meltdown because his morning banana had the audacity to break in half. I was mentally calculating...
What I Learned Debugging Life With Baby Pigs
I'm currently sitting on the kitchen linoleum at 3:14 AM with a laser thermometer in one hand and a syringe of milk replacer in the other. My 11-month-old daughter is finally asleep upstairs after a brutal teething episode, and I'm...
The truth about a baby horse, toddler safety, and fairy hooves
Three people gave me completely conflicting advice when my toddler developed a sudden, violent obsession with farm animals. My mother-in-law claimed children and equines share a psychic bond that transcends language. My old charge nurse from the pediatric trauma unit...
Why The Simone Biles Baby Rumors Make Me Rethink Family Boundaries
My mother-in-law was hovering a forkful of heavily buttered mashed potatoes in mid-air when she casually asked if we had started trying for "the sequel" yet, which is a genuinely wild thing to ask someone who hasn't slept for a...
My In-Laws, A Drop-Side Crib, And The Great Grandparent Divide
It was 10:14 AM on a Tuesday, I was wearing a nursing tank that smelled strongly of sour milk and desperation, and my mother-in-law had just proudly wheeled a vintage, splintering drop-side crib into my living room. I'm pretty sure...
The Truth About Baby Bliss (And Why It Doesn't Have a Power Cord)
The smell of singed nylon bathmat is something that stays with you. I was standing in my cramped Chicago bathroom, trying to salvage two hours of sleep with some under-eye concealer, when Kiran started doing his signature banshee wail from...
Why We Traded Stuffy Showers for the Modern Co-Ed Baby Bash
I'm sitting on a pastel-pink velvet chair in a suburban banquet hall watching my cousin unwrap her nineteenth burp cloth. Someone is measuring her waist with toilet paper while a group of aunts I haven't seen since my wedding stare...
What Is An Anchor Baby? Debugging A Toxic Immigration Myth
My 11-month-old son had just figured out how to forcefully eject his mashed peas across our kitchen island when my wife Mayaβs college roommate, Sofia, started quietly crying over her water glass. Sofia is six months pregnant. Her husband, Leo,...