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Baby Shower Invitations: The Brutal Truth About Modern Stationery
I'm currently using a dull butter knife to scrape dried, crusty hummus off a piece of 600gsm letterpress cardstock. It's an RSVP card that my two-year-old twin daughters, Florence and Matilda, managed to intercept before I could tally the final...
The Truth About Surviving Your Own Baby Shower
I was thirty-one weeks pregnant, sitting on my incredibly dusty apartment floor in Chicago, staring at a mountain of tissue paper while my mother-in-law asked why I hated color. She had wanted royal blue balloons everywhere. I had asked for...
How to Actually Make Your Amazon Baby Registry Searchable
I was sitting on my living room floor, nine months pregnant with my oldest, sobbing into a pile of unfolded onesies because my mother-in-law called to say my registry didn't exist. There's this massive lie we all buy into when...
Baby Shower Games That Won't Make Your Guests Cringe
I was thirty-five weeks pregnant with my oldest, feet swollen into the shape of overcooked sausages, sitting on a floral armchair in a rural Texas living room while my mother-in-law's friend Brenda aggressively inhaled a microwaved Snickers bar smeared inside...
Real Talk Baby Shower Ideas That Won't Make You Cringe
I was sitting at my kitchen island at 28 weeks pregnant with my first, staring at my phone as three completely different realities collided in my text messages. My grandma was insisting we rent out the church fellowship hall for...
The truth about baby gift boxes and the newborn denim delusion
It was day four of being a dad, precisely 2:14 AM. The baby was actually asleep, which felt like a trap, but I was too exhausted to care. I was standing in our living room illuminated only by the microwave...
Decoding The Perfect Infant Gift Set Without Crashing Your System
I'm currently staring at a miniature denim jacket that features six fully functional, incredibly stiff metal buttons. My son is eleven months old now, but when he was a newborn, someone handed us a beautifully wrapped box containing this rigid...
Why the baby bodys lustig trend is a medical nightmare
It was 3:14 AM. The dim light of the nursery humidifier was casting a sickly green glow over the changing table. Maya had just delivered a blowout of epic proportions, a true code brown that defied the laws of physics,...
The painfully honest truth about willkommensgeschenke fΓΌr babys
My mother-in-law arrived on day three clutching what looked like a Victorian christening gown and declared that a new baby must only be dressed in white lace. The DHL bloke who dropped off our tenth Amazon box of the week...