The Truth About the Baby Steps Game Uncensored Search Trend
I'm sitting on the floor of our extremely cramped London living room, scraping a substance that might be mashed banana (but is almost certainly worse) off my left knee, when my phone buzzes with a frantic text from my sister....
The Honest Truth About Needing a Baby Play Pen
My mother-in-law told me a baby play pen is a cage that stunts gross motor skills and ruins a child's natural curiosity. My neighbor, on the other hand, told me she leaves her daughter in one for four hours a...
What A Giant Baby Penguin Taught Me About Raising Kids
It was 3:14 AM. I know this because my eyes were burning from the glare of my phone screen, and I was pinned to the rocking chair by my six-month-old, who currently possesses the density and general shape of a...
Why The Great Baby Oatmeal Cereal Incident Finally Broke My Spirit
It's 11:14 AM on a Tuesday, and I'm staring at a perfectly spherical glob of beige paste slowly sliding down my otherwise immaculate kitchen window. It hangs there for a moment, defying gravity, before dropping directly onto the cat's head....
The Truth About Baby Ladybugs (And When Your Kid Eats One)
I was sitting on our patchy backyard lawn in my stained grey sweatpants, holding a mug of coffee that had been microwaved three times since 6 AM, when Maya ate her first bug. She was about eight months old, right...
Troubleshooting Your Grinch Baby When Holiday Chaos Hits
I'm currently sweating through my favorite flannel shirt while attempting to stuff my eleven-month-old son into a synthetic, neon-green elf costume that has actual jingle bells aggressively sewn onto the collar. He is thrashing around like a fish on a...
Surviving the Hell Baby Phase When You Are Running on Empty
The microwave clock says three in the morning, the only light in your kitchen is the green digital glow, and you're bouncing on a yoga ball so hard your knees ache while holding a rigid infant who sounds like a...
Ice cube ice ice baby: Why the freezer trend is a terrible idea
When my son cut his first tooth, I got three contradictory texts in the span of an hour. My mother called to tell me to wrap an ice cube in a clean muslin cloth and let him gnaw on it,...
Oh Baby I Love Your Way: How Infants Actually Show Affection
It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday in November, and the apartment was absolutely freezing. I was standing in the middle of our tiny hallway wearing my husband Dave’s hideous neon orange high school track shirt—the one that smells permanently...