The Stroller Blanket Learning Curve: A Dad's Cold Weather Guide
We were exactly three blocks from the coffee shop on Hawthorne, the wind was doing that aggressive Portland damp-chill thing, and my 11-month-old was screaming as if I had deeply offended him. I had tucked him into the travel system...
The Truth About Long Sleeve Onesies Before You Buy Everything
I was standing in the middle of my living room in late July, sweating clean through my postpartum leggings, holding a screaming, rigid newborn who looked and sounded exactly like an angry watermelon. I had just tried to force a...
The Great Winter Layering Myth and Why Baby Tights Fix Everything
Here's the biggest lie the baby industrial complex ever sold us: that infants need pants. And separate socks. I'm staring into the middle distance right now just remembering the sheer delusion I operated under with my first kid, Leo. It...
Why The Right Toddler Sweater Stops Winter Car Seat Panic
"Put a proper heavy coat on those girls," my mother-in-law announced last Tuesday, eyeing the twins as if I were deliberately trying to freeze them to death on our walk to the park. "They'll completely overheat in the boot of...
Finding the Best Infant Face Cream (A Letter to Past Me)
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting in the Target parking lot in your Subaru. It's raining. You have a lukewarm vanilla latte in the cup holder that you forgot to drink because you were too busy...
My Guide to Surviving a Childrens Wear Sale Without Going Broke
I was standing in the middle of a fluorescent-lit mega-store with sweat actively pooling in my lower back, bouncing a screaming six-month-old on my hip while trying to wrestle a bright orange, plastic-feeling puffer coat into my shopping cart simply...
Dear Past Sarah: Stop Doing Wake-Up Math and Buy the Merino Bag
Dear Sarah of exactly six months ago, You're currently standing in the doorway of Leo's room at 2:14 AM. You're wearing Dave's stained Villanova hoodieβthe one with the mysterious bleach mark on the sleeveβand you're holding a mug of French...
Dear Past Marcus: The Skianzug Kinder Survival Guide I Wish I Had
Dear Marcus of exactly six months ago, currently staring blindly at a wall of synthetic winter gear at the REI in the Pearl District while Sarah texts you asking if you've found anything waterproof yet. I'm writing to you from...
Why your toddler needs real fishing bibs (and not cute raincoats)
There's a very specific, high-pitched intake of breath a two-year-old makes when the icy water pooling on a rented fibreglass boat seat finally breaches her supposedly "weather-resistant" corduroy trousers. Itβs a sound that cuts through the roar of a vintage...