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Building Your First Baby Layette: A Tech Dad's Hardware Guide
At 37 weeks into my wife's pregnancy, I proudly stood in our nursery looking at my haul. I had acquired exactly fourteen pairs of newborn sneakers, three miniature denim jackets, a tiny tuxedo, and zero functional sleepwear. I approached our...
The Utter Absurdity of Buying a Baby Golf Outfit for Toddlers
Iβm currently watching my two-year-old daughter, Florence, attempt to swallow a brightly coloured plastic golf tee while her twin sister, Matilda, aggressively reverse-crawls her way out of a sand bunker. Weβre at a rather stiff, overly manicured Surrey golf club...
The accidental gymnast and the gravity problem with your two-month-old
We need to talk about the biggest lie circulating in your local mom group. You know the one. You're sitting on someone's beige rug, sipping lukewarm coffee, and another mother casually drops that her eight-week-old is already rolling over. She...
The absolute truth about a black baby changing diaper routine
It's 3:17 a.m. and I'm staring down twin number one (or possibly twin number two, the darkness and sleep deprivation blur them into one collective entity of demands) while the distinct, unmistakable aroma of impending doom wafts from her cot....
What I Got Completely Wrong About Building My First Baby's Layette
I was standing in the middle of our driveway in a pair of Dave's gym shorts that I'd aggressively rolled down underneath my 38-week pregnant belly, holding a tiny, stiff denim jacket with functional metal buttons, and I was just...
The Honest Guide to Surviving Your Baby's Dedication Service
We were standing in the third row of padded chairs, and my daughter was aggressively gnawing on a damp church bulletin. The pastor was three sentences into a long prayer about spiritual legacy, and all I could think about was...
Why My Toxic Relationship With Funny Baby Onesies Finally Ended
Kamini auntie handed me a gift bag that smelled vaguely of mothballs and aggressively cheap vinyl. We were at my baby shower, sitting in a circle of fifty women drinking chai, and I was performing the delicate art of opening...
The Truth About That December 18th Beanie Baby From Your Mom
My mom lugged the giant, opaque Rubbermaid tub through my front door right as I was trying to unlatch a screaming newborn from my chest, kicking off her shoes and announcing that she had finally found my inheritance. It was...
The truth about that Jenna baby nude photo uproar
My mother-in-law swore my baby needed three layers of wool at all times or he would catch a draft and perish instantly. A lactation consultant in a fluorescent hospital basement told me skin-to-skin meant I shouldn't wear a top for...