Magazine
What Nobody Tells You About Your Baby's Breath
When we brought Leo home from the hospital eleven months ago, I received exactly three pieces of contradictory advice about his respiratory system within a forty-eight-hour window. My mother told me to hold a tiny compact mirror under his nose...
Baby Shower Invitations: The Brutal Truth About Modern Stationery
I'm currently using a dull butter knife to scrape dried, crusty hummus off a piece of 600gsm letterpress cardstock. It's an RSVP card that my two-year-old twin daughters, Florence and Matilda, managed to intercept before I could tally the final...
The Truth About Baby Shoes: A Letter To My Clueless Past Self
Dear Sarah from exactly six months ago. You're currently standing in the clearance aisle at Nordstrom Rack at like, 2:15 PM on a Tuesday, wearing those black leggings with the dried yogurt stain on the left knee, aggressively holding a...
The blackberry incident and the truth about baby led weaning
Picture this. I put my six-month-old in a pristine, white outfit for his very first taste of solid food. I handed him a single, perfectly ripe blackberry. I thought it would be a delicate, photogenic moment to share with my...
My toxic relationship with that glowing Baby Einstein aquarium
It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday in November. I'm standing barefoot in the hallway, wearing a stained nursing tank that I still haven't washed even though my son Leo is three and Maya is eight months old, and I'm practically...
Why baby dolls took over my flat (and what the science says)
I'm currently staring at a small, disembodied plastic leg poking out from beneath our sofa. It belongs to βBaby Susanβ, a doll who has suffered more blunt force trauma in the past three weeks than an amateur rugby player. If...
The Real Story Behind Keeping Your Kid Alive in the Backseat
The discharge nurse was watching me. We were on level three of the Northwestern Memorial parking garage, the Chicago wind was howling through the concrete pillars, and my husband was weeping silently while trying to wrestle a five-pound infant into...
The Absurd Reality of Handing Your Infant a Rack of Baby Back Ribs
I'm sitting across the dining table watching one of my six-month-old twin daughters hold a massive, grease-slicked pork bone in her tiny, dimpled fist. She is gnawing on it with the intense, primal focus of a prehistoric hunter who has...
The ugly truth about that baby alive doll hiding in your playroom
I'm standing over my kitchen sink at eleven at night with a pair of surgical tweezers, trying to extract a solid black clump of fermented synthetic cherry mush from the plastic esophagus of a toy. This is not how I...