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A tired London dad holding two toddlers away from a glass patio door while a fox sits outside.

The Hackney Standoff: Two Babies, One Urban Fox, Zero Dignity

At 5:43 AM on a drizzly Tuesday, I found myself in a high-stakes staring contest with a mangy urban fox. I was armed only with a lukewarm mug of instant coffee and two extremely confident toddlers who were aggressively wielding...

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A tired dad holding a sleeping baby wrapped in an organic cotton blanket.

Raising a Lil Baby Son: Hip-Hop Myths and the Messy Reality

My mate Dave invited me over last Tuesday to meet his newborn, and within four minutes of crossing the threshold, he proudly showed me the tiny, immaculate pair of Air Jordans he’d bought for his three-week-old child. The cultural expectation...

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London dad holding two toddlers while looking exhausted but vaguely hopeful.

The Kylie Jenner Baby Daddy Setup: A 3 AM Letter To Myself

You’re currently hiding in the downstairs loo, aren't you? It’s 3:14 AM, the bathroom tiles are freezing through your socks, and you’ve locked the door because the twins are finally asleep after a three-hour screaming match about who gets to...

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A stressed father holding two toddlers while looking at a water leak on the ceiling.

What the Katrina babies taught me about parenting in a crisis

It was a wet Tuesday afternoon in November when the kitchen ceiling began to ominously bow, creating a distended, watery underbelly right above the toaster. A pipe had burst somewhere in the floorboards above, and as I desperately tried to...

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A dad looking exhausted while holding a smartphone and a baby teether.

Josh and Aubree Jones Named Their Baby Disney (And I Get It)

Dear past Tom You're currently sitting on the bathroom floor at 3:14 AM, using a cold, damp flannel to wipe what you fervently hope is pureed parsnip off your left shoulder. Beatrice (the twin who currently believes she's a domesticated...

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London dad covered in white dust changing a baby nappy at 3am.

Surviving The Dust Cloud: Johnson's Baby Powder & Nappy Rash

It’s 3:14 AM on a Tuesday. The heating in our London flat is making that ominous clanking sound that usually precedes a massive repair bill, and Florence (Twin A, currently the undisputed heavyweight champion of dramatic screaming) has decided her...

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Tired dad holding a bottle of baby wash next to twin girls

A letter to myself about Johnson and Johnson baby shampoo

Dear Tom of exactly six months ago, You're currently standing in the baby aisle of the High Street Kensington Boots, staring blankly at a wall of brightly coloured plastic bottles, sweating profusely into your jumper. You have a pram the...

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A pristine white bottle of baby powder sitting abandoned next to modern barrier creams

My chaotic journey with johnson and johnson baby powder

I'm currently staring at a pristine, vintage-looking white bottle that my mother-in-law managed to smuggle into our London flat like highly illegal contraband. She placed it next to the nappies with a conspiratorial wink, whispering that the twins "needed to...

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Tired dad holding a coffee mug and looking confused at his phone

The jason lee and tiffany haddish baby rumour broke my brain

Whatever you do, don't look at celebrity Instagram accounts at three in the morning while one of your two-year-olds is actively trying to dismantle a stair gate with a plastic spoon. I made this massive mistake last August, which is...

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