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11-month-oldbaby proofinghealthmillennialparenting humorpet safety
Tired dad holding infant medication while looking confused at a limping golden retriever.

The truth about baby aspirin for dogs: a total system failure

Dear Marcus of six months ago. You're currently standing barefoot on the cold hexagon tiles of the upstairs bathroom, and the clock on your phone says it's 2:14 AM. Your golden retriever, Barnaby, is whining rhythmically and favoring his front...

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babydevelopmentorganicparenting tipspet safetytoddler
A small baby guinea pig resting near a toddler's hand

The Brutal Truth About Baby Guinea Pigs Nobody Tells Parents

The teenager behind the counter at the pet store was casually explaining to a mother that if she touched her new baby guinea pig, the mother pig would smell human on the baby and eat it. I had to physically...

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baby accessorieschildhoodearly developmentmotherhoodparenting humorpet safety
A stressed mom standing next to a plastic hamster cage holding a baby in a messy living room

Surprise, You Now Have a Dozen Hamsters (Surviving the Litter)

"Momma, Princess Fluffbutt split into tiny pink jellybeans!" That was how my four-year-old announced we were suddenly harboring fugitives on a Tuesday morning while I was elbow-deep in packing tape for my Etsy shop and trying to keep the baby...

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4-month-oldbabybabyproofingoutdoorparenting humorpet safety
Toddler looking at a baby ostrich through a car window at a drive-through safari

Surviving a Baby Ostrich Encounter With Your Sanity Intact

Before we packed up the minivan to visit the drive-through wildlife ranch out by the highway last weekend, I managed to get three entirely contradictory pieces of advice about the ostriches. My mom, bless her heart, told me on the...

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baby pugearly developmentfamily caremotherhoodparenting humorpet safety
A tiny pug puppy sitting on a rug next to a crawling baby and wooden toys.

Dear Past Me: What to Know Before Getting a Pug Puppy

Dear Jess from last October. You’re currently standing in the driveway holding a cardboard box that contains what looks like a hyperactive, three-pound baked potato with giant eyeballs, and you're entirely too confident about this life choice. I know exactly...

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Babybaby carebaby feedingparenting humorpet safety
A messy baby bull phase with a bulldog staring at pureed carrots

Surviving the Baby Bull Phase: Blenders, Bulldogs, and Purees

I was standing in my kitchen wearing yesterday's yoga pants, staring at a splatter of neon orange sweet potato on my ceiling while our rescue pit mix tried to lick the matching orange stain off my six-month-old's foot. The myth...

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11-month-oldbaby gearbehaviorfatherhoodparenting humorpet safety
Tired dad separating baby toys from massive dog chew toys on a living room rug

The Baby Rottweiler Protocol: Debugging Life With a 100-Pound Dog

The system totally crashed on a Tuesday at 4:13 PM. It was pouring rain here in Portland, which meant our 115-pound dog, Buster, had completely refused to step outside to use the bathroom and was currently running on 100 percent...

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11-month-oldbaby cryinghumormillennialparenting anxietypet safety
Exhausted dad staring at his pacing dog while the baby wails in the nursery

Why Your Dog Freaks Out When the Kid Screams (A Father's Log)

Dear Marcus from exactly six months ago, You're currently sitting on the hallway floor at 3:14 AM. You have the tracking app open on your phone, verifying that the nursery is exactly 69.5 degrees with 44 percent humidity, and you...

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Babymillennialorganic baby clothesparenting humorpet safetysafe play
A tired mom sitting on the living room floor keeping a large dog away from a newborn

How to Bring a Baby Home to Your Dog Without Losing Your Mind

I was sitting on my faux-Navajo living room rug, covered in sour milk spit-up, physically restraining my 70-pound mutt Buster by his collar while my newborn screamed in the bassinet, trying to mentally sort through the absolute circus of advice...

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