Why the Teething Freezer Trick is a Disaster (And the Silicone Fix)
I was standing in front of the open refrigerator at 3:14 AM wearing a t-shirt Iβd spilled coffee on twelve hours earlier, holding my oldest son Tucker while he screamed bloody murder. He was about five months old, drooling like...
The 3 AM Poop Blowout That Saved Me From Over-The-Head Onesies
There was poop in Leoβs ear. I donβt mean a little smudge, I mean a scientifically impossible amount of bright yellow liquid nightmare that had somehow defied gravity and traveled all the way up his back, past his neck, and...
The ganzkΓΆrper lΓ€tzchen saved my twins from tomato sauce ruin
There's a persistent, incredibly damaging rumour floating around antenatal classes that starting your baby on solid food is a gentle, aesthetic journey. You're led to believe you'll hand your darling infant a perfectly steamed baton of sweet potato, which they'll...
The brutal truth about buying your baby's winter sweater
It was mid-November in Chicago, which means the wind off the lake feels like tiny knives. I was running late for a four-month well-child check. My mother-in-law had gifted us this thick, chunky-knit mustard pullover that looked adorable on the...
Why Pippi LΓ€tzchen Saved Us from the Teething Drool Nightmare
I'm standing in my kitchen at 4:12 PM on a Tuesday in late November. I'm wearing my husband's oversized grey fleece that smells vaguely of stale coffee and desperation, and I'm holding my five-month-old son, Leo. He is screaming. Not...
Die richtige ZahnbΓΌrste fΓΌr Kleinkinder finden (ohne Drama)
Meine Schwiegermutter drΓ€ngte mich am Dienstagmorgen in der KΓΌche in die Ecke β sie trug diese furchteinflΓΆΓende SchΓΌrze mit den riesigen Sonnenblumen, an der noch etwas Mehl klebte β, fuchtelte mit einem Pfannenwender herum und meinte: βRubbel einfach mit einem...
Why lΓ€tzchen personalisiert saved my daycare sanity
It was a Tuesday in late October, and I was staring at the neckline of my middle kidβs shirt like it was an active crime scene. The blue terry-cloth drool catcher around his neck had a faded, washed-out Sharpie mark...
Why The Wrong Infant Play Mat Will Ruin Your Tuesday Afternoon
It was 2:14 PM on a particularly bleak, rain-lashed London Tuesday, and a plastic, primary-coloured toucan was aggressively singing a distorted, tinny version of βLa Cucarachaβ while swinging precisely three inches above my daughterβs nose. I was sitting on the...
Surviving the newborn clothing trap and the truth about baby shirts
The meconium was somehow behind his left ear. I was twenty-four hours postpartum, sitting in a dimly lit Chicago hospital room, trying to remove a rigid, non-stretch cotton collar from my son's wobbly, grapefruit-sized head without getting the black tar-like...