Magazine
Why We Are Obsessed With The Homeless Billionaire Baby Daddy
My mother-in-law told me I just needed to pray harder to find my village. The lactation consultant at the hospital said I needed to schedule self-care in fifteen-minute increments. My best friend, three margaritas deep, told me to just download...
The Absurd Reality of Raising a Hemangioma Baby (And Not Dying)
If you ever find yourself holding your phone's flashlight inches from your sleeping infant's shoulder at three in the morning while furiously typing "rapidly growing bright red lump" into a search engine, just shut the laptop and go to sleep,...
When the 'he was molested as a baby boy polo g song' trend hit
Dear Priya from six months ago. You're sitting on the living room rug right now watching your son play with a wooden block. You've got your phone in your left hand. You're about to post that video of him smearing...
The Halle Bailey Baby Guide to Setting Firm Internet Boundaries
I was standing near the NHS hospital vending machine, running entirely on stale Wotsits and pure adrenaline, when I made my first catastrophic parenting error. Instead of texting my mum a deeply unflattering, slightly terrifying photo of my newborn twins...
The Honest Truth About Buying H&M For Your Baby's Wardrobe
Iβm currently staring at a mountain of beige ribbed leggings that have somehow survived three kids, while desperately trying to stretch the neck hole of a brand new so-called sustainable bodysuit that my youngest just got his giant head stuck...
The Truth About Ugly Baby Gear and Why I Stopped Caring
I was standing in the Target parking lot in mid-December, wearing black maternity leggings that were literally falling down because my postpartum body was in that weird, deflated balloon phase, and I was sobbing aggressively. Like, ugly, loud, snorting sobs....
What Age Do Babies Start Crawling? A Tech Dad's Reality Check
I'm lying flat on the cold oak floor of our Portland living room with a digital laser measure, trying to calculate the exact trajectory of my eleven-month-old daughter. She isn't moving toward me. She's pushing herself violently backward like a...
What Is A Baby Boomer? A Survival Guide to Modern Grandparents
Don't, under any circumstances, pull up a PDF from the NHS while your father is trying to demonstrate how to properly swaddle an infant using a terrifyingly thick, incredibly scratchy polyester quilt from 1982. I did this during our first...
Dear Past Me: How to Survive the Whiny Baby Phase Without Losing It
You're currently standing in the kitchen staring into the glow of the open refrigerator at 3:14 AM, listening to the relentless, high-pitched vocalizations coming from the nursery monitor. You're holding a cold bottle of formula in one hand and your...