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A tired mother holding her crying toddler at the daycare door

Surviving the bye bye baby phase without losing your mind

I'm standing in the doorway of a toddler room that smells like wet wipes and desperation. My daughter's fingers are locked into the fabric of my jeans with the grip strength of a rock climber. Another mother just walked in,...

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Confused dad pushing a stroller through a retail store aisle

I Survived the Buybuy Baby Relaunch (And My Wife's Registry List)

I was sitting in the driver's seat of my Honda Civic last Tuesday, blinking stupidly at a massive blue and white sign in a New Jersey strip mall, completely convinced I had slipped into an alternate timeline. My wife, Sarah,...

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Nervous dad looking at a blurry 2D infant sonogram screen in a dark clinic room

Baby Ultrasound Expectations vs. Reality: A Nervous Dad's Guide

The worst Tuesday of my entire life started in a strip mall between a discount vape shop and a dry cleaner that smelled aggressively like harsh chemicals. My wife, Sarah, was 28 weeks pregnant, and her sister had gifted us...

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Toddler pointing at a baby swan near a pond from a safe distance

The Great Bread Deception: Meeting A Baby Swan (And Surviving)

It's a crisp Tuesday morning at St James's Park, and an elderly gentleman in a tweed flat cap is hurling massive, doughy chunks of supermarket sliced white bread into the water. A fluffy grey cygnetβ€”which I've just spent ten minutes...

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Sarah holding a cold coffee while her toddler runs pantsless down the hallway

Navigating Baby Steps Nudity and Family Privacy (And Pants)

It was 7:13 AM on a Tuesday, and I was standing in my entryway wearing a stained NYU sweatshirt from 2009, holding a mug of coffee that had already gone cold because I’d left it on the bathroom counter for...

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6-month-oldbabyfeedingparenting humourSolid Food & Finger Food
A messy baby eating avocado toast instead of processed snacks

The Giant Myth About Baby Snacks And What I Actually Feed Them

I was standing in aisle four at Target on a Tuesday at like, 10:45 AM, wearing a nursing tank with a spit-up stain shaped exactly like Florida, holding a six-dollar canister of organic kale-infused star puffs. Maya was eight months...

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A stack of open baby shower cards resting on an organic cotton baby blanket

Writing baby shower wishes that will not make parents roll their eyes

I'm sitting cross-legged on my faded Chicago apartment rug right now. My toddler is methodically dismantling a cardboard box in the corner, looking for a stale Cheerio I know he dropped three days ago. I'm holding a stack of heavy...

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A simple naked cake with some fresh berries and green leaves on a wooden table

My Brutally Honest Guide To Surviving The Baby Shower Cake Drama

I was thirty-three weeks pregnant with Maya, wearing a navy blue floral maternity wrap dress from Target that was actively cutting off the circulation to my ribs. It was 2:15 PM on a sweltering Sunday in July, I was sweating...

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A confused dad looking at his phone while an 11-month-old baby plays on a wooden gym.

The Baby Ruth Conundrum: Candy Hazards & Expert Parenting Truths

Last Tuesday, my mother casually suggested I rub some whiskey on my 11-month-old's swollen gums and hand him a chunk of a baby ruth candy bar to chew on while I made dinner. Two hours later, my neighborβ€”a veteran dad...

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