Magazine
How Many Bibs Do I Need For A Newborn? The Spitty Truth
It was Thanksgiving 2017, and Maya was exactly six weeks old. We were at my mother-in-lawβs house, which is basically a museum of white linen and breakable objects, and I was wearing a rust-colored silk blouse because I was, like,...
The Great Wool Disaster: Surviving a Ridiculous Baby Knit Set
The clock on the microwave said 3:14 AM, and the smell hit me before I even reached the landing. It was that distinct, metallic, sweet-yet-horrific scent of a total nappy failure. In the cot, Matilda was standing up, gripping the...
A Penguin With Blanket: Safe Sleep And Sanity For Exhausted Moms
I'm standing in the freezing nursery of our drafty Texas farmhouse at three in the morning, holding my oldest son, Jackson, who's screaming like an absolute banshee. I'm staring in sheer panic at this massive, incredibly thick fleece blanket I'd...
Dear past Priya: Drop the toxic gel teething ring right now
Dear Priya from six months ago. You're currently standing barefoot on the cold kitchen tile at three in the morning. The refrigerator compressor is humming, and your son is doing that raspy, exhausted whimpering thing that makes you feel like...
The Chicken Bone Incident: Unpacking the Food Teethers Trend
I'm staring at my son, who's currently aggressively making out with a stripped chicken drumstick bone. My wife, Sarah, handed it to him exactly four minutes ago. I'm hovering three inches away, sweat pooling in the collar of my Portland...
Dear Past Me: Surviving the Great Cozy Legging Winter Crisis
Dear Tom of six months ago, You're currently standing in the hallway holding a miniature pair of stiff, dark-wash denim jeans. You have a lukewarm coffee balancing precariously on the radiator, and you're sweating profusely as Maya and Isla do...
The Ridiculous Truth About Organic Cotton Socks for Tiny Feet
My left arm is currently wedged shoulder-deep inside the rubber gasket of our Bosch washing machine, fishing for a piece of fabric the size of a tea bag. Maya is howling from the nursery because her left foot is cold,...
The Truth About Organic Infant Socks (and Peeling Ankles)
I was sitting right on the cracked linoleum of my laundry room floor, holding a tiny, sweaty polyester sock in one hand and staring at my six-month-old's ankles in sheer panic. Beau, my oldest, was happily gnawing on a plastic...
Surviving The 3 AM Meltdown Over A Missing Blanket With Foxes
I'm currently on all fours under the sofa, using my phone's torch to illuminate a terrifying graveyard of crushed Wotsits, a rogue piece of Lego, and a dummy that has been missing since last Tuesday. It's 3:14 in the morning....