Magazine

A tired dad holding a wooden baby toy and a coffee cup

A letter to past Tom regarding the babyrassel aus holz trend

Dear Tom from eighteen months ago. You're currently standing in the kitchen of the flat in Highbury at 3:14 in the morning, holding a bag of frozen peas against Florence’s surprisingly robust forehead while Matilda screams from the other room...

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A pile of cheap funny baby bodysuits next to a rash cream

Why the baby bodys lustig trend is a medical nightmare

It was 3:14 AM. The dim light of the nursery humidifier was casting a sickly green glow over the changing table. Maya had just delivered a blowout of epic proportions, a true code brown that defied the laws of physics,...

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First time dad holding 11-month-old baby girl in a functional organic cotton dress

The Great Tulle Disaster: A Dad's Guide to Baby Kleider MΓ€dchen

I was sitting in the back of a rented Subaru in a gravel parking lot in Bend, Oregon, frantically trying to debug a zipper that was hopelessly jammed in three layers of synthetic tulle. The temperature outside was pushing ninety...

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A heavily stained cloth baby bib next to a clean silicone pocket bib.

Dear Past Me: The Messy Truth About Waterproof and Plastic Bibs

Dear Sarah from six months ago, You're currently standing in the baby aisle of that ridiculously overpriced boutique downtown. It’s exactly 10:15 AM on a Tuesday, and you're wearing those black lululemon leggings that definitely have a crusty yogurt stain...

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A tired dad holding two babies in organic cotton onesies

The Brutal, Messy Truth About Surviving Baby Onesies

It was 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, roughly six weeks into the twin experiment, and I was holding a small, violently crying creature at arm's length. The issue wasn't the crying (I'd grown accustomed to the acoustic assault), but rather...

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A loud baby goat chewing an organic cotton baby blanket while a toddler watches.

Looking for Baby Goats for Sale in Cobleskill? Read This

I'm currently hiding in the downstairs loo while my two-year-old twin daughters attempt to dismantle a perfectly good Amazon box in the hallway, and I'm furiously scrolling through listings for baby goats for sale in cobleskill on my phone. You...

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A dad looking bewildered while holding a printed baby shower word search game on a clipboard.

Why I Completely Misjudged The Baby Shower Word Search As A Dad

I was sitting in a folding chair in our Portland backyard, balancing a paper plate of half-eaten potato salad on my knee, staring at a grid of 144 random letters on a piece of recycled cardstock. Across the yard, Sarah's...

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Exhausted dad staring at an iPad screen while his 11-month-old baby chews on a silicone panda teether on the rug

The Great "Baby Tana Porn" Autocomplete Disaster Of 2024

At exactly 7:14 PM last Tuesday, my wife stopped breathing. It wasn't a medical emergency, but rather a sharp, terrifying inhalation of pure, unfiltered judgment. We were sitting on the couch in our Portland living room, the rain aggressively attacking...

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Exhausted dad staring at a glowing baby monitor in a dark nursery

Dear Past Marcus: Debugging The Extraterrestrial Baby Phase

It's 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, and you're staring at the night vision feed on the Nanit monitor like it's a security camera at a haunted house. His eyes are open. They're glowing an iridescent, terrifying white because of the...

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