Magazine

Toddler girl dancing in a living room next to a smartphone playing music

What To Do When "Baby Girl Shake That" Invades Your Nursery

I'm currently watching two identical twenty-four-month-olds attempt what I can only describe as a synchronized club routine in the middle of our kitchen. Twin A is dropping into a deeply concerning squat, while Twin B is executing a rhythmic shoulder...

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Dad holding a baby girl in a yellow organic cotton bodysuit on a porch

Debugging My Baby Girl's First Halloween Costume Disaster

I was standing in the driveway, sweating through my flannel, trying to solve a geometry problem that shouldn't exist. It was 52 degrees in Portland, a classic damp October morning, but my internal CPU was overheating because I couldn't get...

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A very tired mom drinking coffee while staring at unassembled baby gear on a living room rug.

The Absolute Mess Of Buying Baby Gear (And What Actually Works)

It was 2017. November. A Tuesday, I think, and raining completely sideways. I was exactly thirty-two weeks pregnant with Maya, my second kid, and I was sitting completely cross-legged on the cold linoleum floor of aisle four at BuyBuyBaby (RIP...

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Pediatric nurse mom showing realistic baby gas relief techniques.

The 3 AM pediatric nurse guide to surviving baby gas relief

The radiator is hissing in our Chicago apartment and my phone says it's 3:14 in the morning. My infant son is currently executing a flawless crunchy-frog maneuver on the changing table. His knees are pinned tight to his chest. His...

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Tired mother holding her January newborn in a dark nursery

January Newborn Survival: Forget the Baby Garnet Birthstone Myths

It's three in the morning and you're holding a screaming two-week-old in a freezing, dark room. You type something stupid into your phone because you're desperately trying to figure out if your January newborn's stubbornness is astrological. You search for...

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A mom looking out a window at her backyard while holding a coffee mug

The Absolute Panic Of Finding Cute Baby Foxes In Your Backyard

I was standing on our back patio in my husband's hideous oversized college sweatpants, holding a lukewarm mug of French roast that I had literally just microwaved for the third time, when seven-year-old Maya started screaming bloody murder. She was...

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Tired mom holding a baby bottle looking stressed in her kitchen

My Messy, Caffeinated Guide to Decoding Infant Nutrition

It was November 2017 and I was wearing my husband Mark’s oversized college sweatpantsβ€”the ones with the bleach stain on the left thigh that he refuses to throw awayβ€”sitting completely paralyzed on our cold kitchen linoleum at 3:15 AM while...

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A bright neon baby pool float sitting on the edge of a backyard swimming pool in Texas.

Dear Past Jess: What I Wish I Knew Before Buying a Baby Pool Float

Dear Jess from last May, I know you're currently hyperventilating beside the inflatable kiddie pool, tasting cheap PVC plastic because you lost the air pump again, while Jacksonβ€”our lovely, feral four-year-oldβ€”is threatening to launch himself off the patio furniture into...

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Tired dad looking at baby's gums with a small silicone teether

Decoding Baby First Tooth Symptoms: A Late-Night Debugging Guide

Dear Marcus circa six months ago: It's currently 2:14 AM, you're holding a glowing digital thermometer like a tricorder, and you're staring into the mouth of a very angry tiny human. You're convinced her entire operating system is crashing. You're...

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