Magazine

A vintage plush camel sitting on a high display shelf out of reach of a baby

Why Humphrey the Beanie Baby Is a Hard No for My 11-Month-Old

I'm currently holding a beige, slightly cross-eyed plush camel that smells faintly of an attic and 1996. My mother-in-law just proudly handed it to me across our kitchen island. Apparently, she unearthed this thing from her garage after solving the...

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A tired mom packing organic infant clothes and a wooden play gym for a nature trip with her little bush babies.

Raising Little Bush Babies: The Wild Truth About Newborn Care

When I brought my first son home, the hospital sliding doors hadn't even closed behind us before the contradictory advice started rolling in. My own mother leaned over the infant car seat in the parking lot and declared I needed...

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A tired dad holding a smartphone while a baby sleeps in the background

The Late Night Search History of a Clueless Dad

Dear Marcus from six months ago. You're currently sitting on the edge of the bathtub at 3:14 AM, the bathroom tiles are freezing your bare feet, and your phone screen brightness is aggressively burning your retinas because you forgot to...

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Exhausted dad holding two crying babies while glowing smartphone screen sits on coffee table

When baby tears sims 4 complaints broke me during a 3am twin meltdown

It was 3:14 in the morning, and I was illuminated entirely by the sickly blue glow of my phone screen while Twin A writhed against my shoulder like a damp, furious sack of potatoes. Twin B was mercifully unconscious in...

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A messy toddler covered in sticky barbecue sauce sitting in a high chair.

Why Barbecue Sauce is a Toddler Nightmare (And What to Do Instead)

It's 2:00 PM on the Fourth of July, it's ninety-eight degrees in the shade, and I'm sweating through a grey maternity tank top that I should have thrown away three years ago. Leo is fourteen months old and his face...

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Confused British dad holding twins looking at Netflix on TV

Oho Enthan Baby Movie: A Midnight Netflix Trap For Dads

Dear Tom of six months ago. It's 3:14 in the morning, the London rain is lashing against the bedroom window, and you're currently standing in the living room wearing a dressing gown that smells faintly of sour milk and desperation....

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Tired dad holding a dosing syringe and baby medicine bottle under dim kitchen lighting.

The 3AM Kitchen Panic: Surviving the Baby Motrin Maths Test

There's a highly specific, deeply stressful kind of maths you only ever do at 3:17 in the morning, standing barefoot on a cold kitchen tile while a tiny, feverish human wails from the nursery. I usually have a sticky bottle...

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Messy living room floor with baby blankets, a red nightlight, and teething toys scattered around.

Baby By Justin Bieber: From Pop Song To Real Parenting

It was 3 AM, the house was entirely silent except for the hum of our busted AC unit, and I was desperately trying not to drop my firstborn child. Hunter was screaming like I had personally offended him by offering...

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A tired dad holding a plush monster rattle while a toddler climbs his leg

The "asa baby monster" Google Trap: A Guide to Actual Toddler Chaos

There I was, at 3:14 am on a Tuesday, blinking at my glowing phone screen while Twin A rhythmically headbutted my collarbone. I had simply wanted to buy a cute, slightly terrifying novelty onesie for Halloween. I typed what I...

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