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Choosing a baby boy christening outfit that won't cause tears
Listen. The priest was mid-prayer when I saw the kid in the front pew start doing the neck-crane. You know the exact one. That desperate little turtle movement they do when a stiff collar is slowly restricting their airway. I've...
Surviving the 3 AM Nappy Change: A Guide to Magnetic Clothing
Whatever you do, please don't buy the thirty-pack of traditional popper-fastened sleepsuits just because they look like a spectacular bargain on the internet. I did this. I thought I was being incredibly clever, outsmarting the entire infant apparel industry by...
Finding the best evo baby dragon deck (When you thought it was a toy)
Standing in my kitchen at 2 AM, waiting for the bottle warmer to hit exactly 98.6 degrees, I got a text from my 12-year-old nephew asking if I could Apple Pay him five bucks so he could finish building the...
How to Pick a Baby Boy Baptism Outfit for a Catholic Church
Father Michael is speaking at length about the concept of original sin, but I'm entirely focused on preventing my two-year-old daughter, Florence, from eating a laminated hymn book. In the pew ahead of me, my sister is holding my six-month-old...
A Letter to Myself About the Absurdity of Smocked Baby Clothes
Dear Tom of six months ago. I know exactly where you're right now. You're standing in the upstairs bathroom at your mother-in-law's house, holding Maya at arm's length over the porcelain sink. You're staring at a Β£75 hand-smocked, pale blue...
The Honest Truth About Your Baby Dedication (And Surviving It)
Let me paint a picture for y'all. It's Sunday morning, roughly 10:15 AM. I'm sitting in the second pew, sweating clean through my nice silk blouse, while my oldest sonβwho was supposed to look like a literal angel from heavenβis...
The impossible physics of keeping baby socks on kicking feet
At 3:14 AM on a Tuesday, I found myself on my hands and knees in the nursery, using my iPhone flashlight to hunt for a microscopic piece of gray fabric. My eleven-month-old son was asleep in his crib, oblivious to...
Cosas Necesarias Para Un Recien Nacido: A Mom's Honest Guide
I was thirty-four weeks pregnant with my oldest, Hunter, sitting in a nest of packing peanuts on the nursery floor while my husband tried to decipher the instruction manual for an electric wipe warmer. I was sweating through my maternity...
A letter to myself about the perfect onesie set
Listen. You're currently standing over the bassinet at 3:14 AM watching a mustard-yellow stain slowly bloom across the back of your daughter's supposedly leak-proof pajamas. You're exhausted. You're calculating how many hours of sleep you can get before your shift...