Magazine

Dad looking bewildered while trying to diaper a baby boy in a leg cast

A Letter to Past Me About The Baby Boy Cast (And Pee Fountains)

Hey man. It's you from six months in the future. You're currently sitting in room 3 at the pediatric orthopedist in downtown Portland, sweating straight through your flannel shirt, watching a technician wrap your five-month-old's lower half in what looks...

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A tired dad holding a freshly washed baby bottle in a dim kitchen.

Debugging the 2 AM Bottle Wash (And Why We Switched Methods)

It was 2:14 AM. I was standing in the kitchen illuminated only by the harsh blue light of the microwave clock, aggressively scrubbing a plastic milk cylinder with the exact same green and yellow sponge I had just used to...

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Confused dad holding twin toddlers and looking at a smartphone

What I Learned When I Googled the Meaning of Baby Booter

There I was, scraping what I can only assume was fossilised Weetabix off the kitchen skirting board, while my twin daughters, Maya and Zoe, were busy conducting a very loud, off-beat symphony with two wooden spoons and a saucepan. They...

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A messy living room floor covered in wooden baby toys and a half-drank cup of coffee.

Why My Real Life Looks Exactly Like a Baby Blues Comic Today

I'm currently sitting on my slightly sticky living room floor with a half-eaten fish cracker stuck to my left knee. My two-year-old is trying to put the dog in a headlock, and the baby just blew out his diaper with...

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A stressed British dad holding twin toddler girls while looking confused at a phone

The Truth About Baby Kia: A Letter To My Past Parenting Self

You're sitting in traffic on the M25. The rain is hammering against the windscreen of the Vauxhall Astra, and the heater is blasting a smell that can only be described as warm, wet digestive biscuit. In the passenger seat is...

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Baby doing tummy time on a round vegan leather play mat

When Do Babies Crawl? A Tech Dad's Guide to the Locomotion Update

My mom told me my younger brother was sprinting across the living room carpet at six months old. The barista at our local Portland coffee shopβ€”who has definitely never had a childβ€”insisted that his nephew didn't move an inch until...

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Messy baby eating sugar baby watermelon slices

What the Heck is a Sugar Baby (And Why My Kitchen is Sticky)

I was standing at my kitchen island yesterday, scraping dried oatmeal off the counter with a thumbnail while trying to fulfill three Etsy orders for custom nursery signs, when I nearly dropped my phone into a lukewarm mug of coffee....

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Overwhelmed mother trying to quiet a crying baby at a formal event

The Real Shiva Baby Dilemma: Taking Infants to Solemn Events

"Leave 'em at the house," my grandma told me over the phone, her voice crackling through the spotty rural Texas cell service. "Take them, babies represent the circle of life!" my mother-in-law insisted the very next day while aggressively shoving...

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A tired father holding a smartphone while two toddlers play in the background

The Erika Kirk Third Baby Rumour And My Doomscrolling Panic

Whatever you do, absolutely don't lie in bed at 4:13 in the morning with one eye clamped shut to preserve your night vision while violently trying to extract a heavily chewed dummy from beneath a sleeping toddler, only to open...

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