Magazine
The Truth About Wearing That Baby Blue Dress
When I was pregnant with Leo, my mother-in-law cornered me in a Target parking lot to inform me that wearing pale blue to my own baby shower would make me look "clinically exhausted." Two hours later, my wedding photographer friend...
Why the Baby Blue Color Is More Than Just a 90s Nursery Cliche
I was standing in the middle of our empty guest roomβsoon to be the nurseryβholding a paint swatch that looked like a depressed smurf. It was 2 AM, I was aggressively caffeinated, and my wife, Sarah, was staring at me...
Dear Exhausted Jess: The Baby Beluga Magic You Need Right Now
Dear Jess from six months ago. You're sobbing into a sour-smelling burp cloth right now. It's 3:14 AM. The baby is doing that rigid-plank scream that makes your own spine ache, the toddler is asleep in the hallway for some...
The Portland Backyard Bug: Debugging Encounters with Baby Animals
I'm standing in my perpetually damp Portland backyard at 6:15 AM, holding a lukewarm mug of coffee like a shield, while my 11-month-old son, Leo, points a chubby, sticky finger at what appears to be a vibrating pile of dead...
Why I Cannot Stop Staring at the Night Vision Baby Monitor
It's 3:14 AM, and the blue light of my smartphone is the only thing illuminating our bedroom ceiling. My wife is completely unconscious next to me, breathing in a steady rhythm that I deeply envy. Meanwhile, I'm zoomed in 400x...
What the Adriana Smith Baby Case Taught Me About ER Visits
It was 11:45 PM on a Tuesday, and I was standing at my kitchen island slapping shipping labels onto poly mailers for my Etsy shop while the baby monitor glowed next to my tape dispenser. I should have been sleeping,...
What a 1980s Movie Taught Me About Dads and Newborns
Dear Sarah from last October, You're currently sitting in the driver's seat of your Honda Odyssey in a Starbucks parking lot. You're wearing those black Lululemon leggings that have an unidentifiable crusty stain on the left thigh, clutching an iced...
Stop Washing Your Baby Every Night (And How to Pick Better Shampoo)
I was standing in the baby aisle of our local grocery store at 9 PM on a Tuesday, holding a violently pink bottle of "calming lavender bedtime wash" in one hand and my phone in the other. I was trying...
Why I Tossed My Plastic Toys For A Wooden Spielbogen Baby Gym
It was 2:00 PM on a Tuesday, and I was sitting on my living room rug nursing a lukewarm coffee while a giant plastic jungle gym flashed neon green lights directly into my six-week-old's eyeballs. The thing was blaring some...